Thursday, 4 November 2010

The log in Boris' eye

What was Boris saying again? Light-fingered Parisians? Oh.
 "Do you, French people, have a sense of humour?". Gr*mpf. People often think being a french citizen makes me official spokewoman for my country and ask me all sorts of questions.  Do you, French people, really eat snails? Yes. Do you eat little cute rabbits? Yes. Do you stop shaving you hairs in winter? Yes, and in summer too. Do you really bathe in garlic? Do you drink people's blood at night? Yes. Yes, yes and yes !

I answer with my best smile. I don't want to appear upset or worst... Arrogant!

I am part of an undercover national strategy here. It's all about French nation profile raising. I must admit that our little president doesn't facilitate the work. But brick by brick we are rebuilding the reputation of a whole country.

We are ambassadors. Can you hear the blue-white-red flag flapping in the wind, the soft sound of a musician playing accordeon on the Parisian metro line 7? Yes, YOU CAN ! But the quest is long and we sure face a few obstacles on the way.

Boris for example. No not "top delire mega groove" boris. Come on. The "Boris Bikes" Boris, also known as the Mayor of London. He was really proud to say that only 5 of his bikes were stolen since the launch of the hire scheme.

In Paris, 3 000 velibs disappeared in the first 6 months. 8 000 bikes are missing today. Well, well. "Londoners' enthusiasm and inherent honesty is in encouraging contrast to light-fingered Parisians. Long may it continue" said the Mayor one rainy morning of September in the Independent.

Can someone tell him that the competition for the 2012 olympics is over? That Bertrand* moved on and it's all good now?

Oh yes, we know it's just a big joke. Ah ah. English sense of humour, you know the Monthy Python and all that Mister Bean stuff. Of course, the surprisingly low theft rate has nothing to do with Boris learning the lessons from "Bertrand's bikes" (it doesn't sound as good, does it?) and not installing weak locks on London's bicycles. Nope.

Do you, French people, steal? Yes. If shoplifting was a sport, surely we would win a gold medal, mate! Do we have a sense of humour? I think we do. Same as everyone I guess. English, French, German, Russian... Everyone likes having a good laugh right? And stereotypes are easy targets.

Mr Sorokin, leader of Russia’s 2018 World Cup bid against England surely agrees. When he said that London has the highest crime rate when compared with other cities in Europe and the highest level of alcohol consumption among young people... He didn't mean anything by it. Come on, he is Russian!

But I can tell you Boris wasn't pleased and he tweeted it out loud ! "Can't believe Russian slurs over 2018 bid. Please tell them crime is down and London's the most tolerant city in the world". Hey? Where is your sense of humour gone?

Criminals, thieves... we are not so different after all.

* Bertrand Delanoë, Mayor of Paris


  1. j'aime bien te lire ma carrie bradin. bon courage pour défendre nos couleurs fort pâlissantes ces derniers temps. mais sur l'humour, rien à lâcher, attends, on est telllllllllement fun.
    Camouille Lamiche.

  2. Merci Camouille Lamiche ! La nation a besoin de VOUS! Enfin, moi, surtout... ;o))

  3. keep up the fight Caro !!!

  4. c'est moi le commentaire précédant !!